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Just Sayin’: Making friends in the trenches

 

I totally get how in times of crisis or trauma, lifetime connections can be made. When you go through something really difficult with someone, there’s a bond that cannot be broken. If you serve together in the military, there’s a bond. If you go through a residency program, there’s a bond. (OK, not in all cases, but work with me, people.)

 

I speak from an experienced position on this one. I am training for a marathon.

 

In less than six weeks, I will be at the start line of the Baltimore Marathon with my friends Katie and Jen. We’ve effectively been training for this since mid-November of last year, using the Frederick Half Marathon as a mid-point goal. At least that’s when I started running with these two veteran marathoners.

 

Let me tell you what I dislike about marathon training. Holy Moses, are there are lot of miles involved! There was a time when I walked around all super bad for running three miles … and slow, at that! I actually said the following words to a friend this weekend, “We’re ‘only’ running 14 miles next weekend.” That is not normal, people. And then there are the gels you consume. Believe me when I say that if they didn’t serve a purpose in running, I could have gone my whole life without having consumed them. It’s just not good when the best you can say about something is “it’s not that bad.” That doesn’t mean it’s good.

 

On Saturday we were scheduled for 18 miles. Again, given that we’re not breaking any land speed records, it takes some time to cover these distances. And when I’m taking a lot of time, I’m talking more time than I would spend ‘sitting’ and watching a movie, let alone running.

 

So there we are, for hours, pounding the pavement. I have been introduced to “The Runner’s Cone of Silence.” Like what happens in Vegas stays in Vegas, what is said on a run stays on a run. When you run for hours on end with someone, you can’t help but get to know them very personally. Jen and I have been friends for about 6 years, and Katie and I met last November. Because Jen is a mutual friend, we knew of each other long before we met, and it turns out Katie had mentally signed me up for marathon training before I had a chance to tell her she was crazy.

 

No topics are off the table. We have talked about anything and everything. I’ve learned so much about these ladies both through conversation and experience. We’ve laughed at some things we’ve seen along the way, including a less-than-clothed man, who to his credit probably never expected three women to run down his rural street in the dark at 5:45 a.m. (I didn’t see him, but I was informed by the gal who did to speed my pace in case he happened to notice. I’m calling that interval training.)

 

I’m convinced that you can’t spend that many hours with someone doing something challenging and not bond.

 

Yep, I see many years of friendship ahead of me with these gals. Whether it involves another marathon, I don’t know. I think we’d all like – at least for once – to get together to run just for the sake of running. At least I know we’ll have plenty to talk

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